A.k.a.

Before I had my kid I balked at the idea of being referred to as "The Czar's Mom". That signified the ultimate identity loss and I wanted no part of it.

Then I started hanging out with other parents. Suddenly I was asking if "Ruby's Mom" would be joining us at the park so I could get that scone recipe. I learned another secret no one tells you before becoming a parent - your brain becomes so addled by hormones and sleeplessness that you can really only keep certain names in your head, and they usually correspond to the smaller and cuter person in the duo. (Let's face it, as cute as you think you are, your kid is always cuter.)

I haven't lost my identity. However, call me "The Czar's Mom" at a dinner party and I'll scratch your eyes right out.